Sometimes I buy games and just never play them. Sometimes I buy games and then see someone play it on Twitch and say to myself “shit, that looks fun as hell” and then proceeds to go buy it and realize that the game is already in my Steam library.

Sometimes I am just an idiot.

This week’s game is just that, a game that I could have gotten in front of but didn’t and now I look like a band wagon-ing ass. Rest assured, that is true most of the time, but as it sits at this computer desk and talks about Vampire Survivors this week, know that, yeah, I’m on the bandwagon.

Vampire Survivors is an action roguelike developed and published by poncle. It was released into Early Access on Steam in December of 2021 and is currently $3.

No story just survivor the night with an absolute shit-ton of enemies hurling towards you at every possible moment. it is a timed survival game so try to hit, I think, the thirty-minute mark and survive the night. If not, try as hard as possible to acquire as much gold as possible to help the next survivor.

There are lots of characters and abilities to choose from. The current count for my game is eight playable characters and every single one has a unique ability that sets them apart from each other. One character may gain additional projectiles, another may start with an additional percentage of the area of effect, while another will start with a permanent weapon cooldown percentage.

All you gotta do is move. W,A,S, and D is all you need for a game like this.

Walk around the endless map, kill guys with timed weapons, collect their sweet crystals to level up. When leveling up you get a choice of three abilities (four if you invested in luck): It may be extra projectiles, weapon cooldown time, axes, holy water, garlic, knives, wands, ETC. Each weapon has a tier that can be leveled until it hits, what I like to call, the “Ultimate Weapon.” These weapons are the most powerful in the game and can decimate any enemy attempting to get in your way.

Bad guys come in a lot of forms, from ghosts and bats to werewolves and medusa. All have a health bar that is indicative of how much time has passed in the run. Minibosses and boss enemies will show up and you’ll know when. Bosses TANK damage and if you are able to defeat them, they will drop chests that can have a variety of different upgrades in them.

Another one of those pixel graphic games and man it looks good. All the baddies and environments are varied and look great.

The music is super catchy. It really fits the aesthetic of the game. Sounds are reminiscent of Castlevania music where it is just fast-paced and Victorian sounding. Nothing but praise for the music.

Vampire Survivors is an extremely addictive game. Runs can last anywhere from five minutes to a half-hour. I easily put five hours into this game within a day of picking it up. The game is easily accessible to everyone, there are enough upgrades that will not overwhelm players, waves of enemies will either rip you to shreds or they will fall in droves to your massive power. It is really just a power fantasy game. You will become super powerful very quickly and watch enemies and it is great to watch it all unfold.

God, what a great game.

It’s literally only $3. There is no excuse. If you like Rouge-lites or likes, you WILL like Vampire Survivors.